It's one thing to know it but another to admit
We're the worst band in the world
But we don't give a....
If Garbo played guitar with Valentino on the drums
Then we'd be nothing more than a bunch of darma bums
So tune up, tune up
Well we've never done a days work in our life
And our records sell in zillions
It irrigates my heart with greed
To know that you adore me
Up yours, up mine
But up everybody's that takes time -
But we're working on it
Working on it (Ooh)
We never seen the van - leave it to the roadies -
Never met the roadies - leave them in the van
All because of circumstances way beyond control
We became the darlings of this thing called rock and roll, ooh
Here I am a record on a jukebox
A little piece of plastic with a hole, ooh
Play me
Buy me and you play me then my plastic turns to gold
Here we are together on your hi fi
A little piece of plastic with a hole, oh
Fade me, fade me, fade me, fade me.....I can wash out 44 pairs of socks and have 'em hangin out on the line
I can starch & iron 2 dozens shirts 'fore you can count from 1 to 9
I can scoop up a great big dipper full of lard from the drippins can
Throw it in the skillet, go out & do my shopping, be back before it melts in the pan
'Cause I'm a woman! W-O-M-A-N, I'll say it again
I can rub & scrub this old house til it's shinin like a dime
Feed the baby, grease the car, & powder my face at the same time
Get all dressed up, go out and swing til 4 a.m. and then
Lay down at 5, jump up at 6, and start all over again
'Cause I'm a woman! W-O-M-A-N, I'll say it again
If you come to me sickly you know I'm gonna make you well
If you come to me all hexed up you know I'm gonna break the spell
If you come to me hungry you know I'm gonna fill you full of grits
If it's lovin you're likin, I'll kiss you and give you the shiverin' fits
'Cause I'm a woman! W-O-M-A-N, I'll say it again
I got a twenty-dollar gold piece says there ain't nothing I can't do
I can make a dress out of a feed bag and I can make a man out of you
'Cause I'm a woman! W-O-M-A-N, I'll say it again
'Cause I'm a woman! W-O-M-A-N, and that's all.